417

12 o'clock it was. Nearly anyway. Might have been just after as I was rather late in getting up on the 25th. Our Cat- HHHCB - is less insistent about getting up earlies on Christmas morn.

We'd just arrived at The Crofter to give our good cheer only, I didn't have much to give. What with all the wind of late and my dose of grumps that day - probably caught from the Crofter the day before if the truth was to be known - I was dragging my knuckles on the ground and being generally miserable. That soon changed when I saw the spread on the table and the smiling inhabitants of The Croft. And proper Crofter [with an English lilt] food too. Cake and more cake. See the top snap, Mr Crofter is carving a slice of iced Christmas Cake for his delectation. Oh, and in the other snaps too. I'm sure it was a nice cake. The coconut things that looked like mince pies were I can assure you.

Apparently this was mid-morning break. The animules didn't get it mind you. Just them Crofters. Oh, and Eve and I.

Slight apologies for the snap typatery. I was using a little point and shoot Pentax camera I'd acquired for a song and which kept flashing inside the house. The film was old traffic surveillance film I got from Germany. I managed to open the back of the camera by mistake in the light when the roll of film hadn't gone back into the cassette so developed the film in print developer as it's cheaper and quicker as I thought the snaps would be ruined. They were not as it happened - although maybe lacking the subtle tonality of my usual offerings :-)

416

Away in a manger, the Crofter is slumped
Too tired to sleep so there he is dumped

The stars in the panto down in Stornoway
Know nothing of the Crofter laying down in the hay.

I could go on but won't. I'll spare you all the trouble.

 Mr 'cool' David Crofter Dad

 Mr Crofter surveys all that haunts him

 Mrs 'Keeps them all in order' Sue Crofter Mum practices her charades in front of the discerning hamsters

Mr 'thank goodness I'm too old' Turk scurries away from Dad Crofter. 

Instead I shall pass on good wishes from The Crofter, the crofter's Mum & Dad [and Turk]. They hope you all have a wonderful 2014- as I do.

And thanks for visiting the blog this year.

.

415

The Crofter is pleased as punch for the Royal visitor.

Her Highness Henrietta Cartier-Bresson paid a visit to the Croft - as she does regularly I'm told. Only this time she followed me down the road to keep me company and protect me from the ravages of the animules and The Crofter. Respectfully she stayed outside the perimeter gate and watched as I fended off the beasts.

414

The Crofter was happy this morning. For some reason. It might have been the hired hand who was on the premises humping 'stuff' here and there and generally being a nice chap. Mr Crofter was thinking about the tooths he had to be making later on and Dad Crofter was sweeping hay from the ground. The soggy sheeps who has been around the place the last few days couldn't be bothered to eat it.

413

Oh joy of joy. The shovelling of the smelly stuff out of the hutches has proven beneficial with a plethora of little piglings running hither and thither around the place, eating The Crofter out of house and home. Two lots of piglings as it happens. Two extra loads of smelly stuff too.

They are lovely though. Tis a pity they don't stay like that - all small and cudley. Could fit a couple of them mantle-shelf here to hold the books up. Though thinking on, they books may go haywire - or get eaten.

The geeses are still shouting at everyone who comes within earshot - and some who don't. Anyone want a goose for Yuletide lunch? I'll get the little b***ers quiet somehow.

Dad Crofter is smiling on - as usual.

412

New life

411

We have staff you know. When I say 'we' what I really mean is The Crofter. And not it's not Mum and Dad - bless their cotton-mix socks but rather Shaun helping out today on his day off from his proper job.

The new staff waiting for orders

Shaun is a really hard worker having helped with the apportionment fencing some time back. You can see this from the snap above. Obviously, he's the one with his hands in his pockets waiting for orders and his bucket of tea. In no time Shaun had been promoted to executive level and was shovelling s , s , stuff from the pig hutches.

I left him to it and ventured into the barn where I found Dad Crofter doing un-thinkable things to an ex-chicken - no longer nailed to its metaphorical perch. I came home soon after.

410

Did you think I'd given up on this Eh? I mean, did you?

Well I haven't. I have been off the island to see a tree or two, walk the walk and talk the talk. And listen to Ronnie Ross tinkle his ivories - although that was a bit of a mistake if I'm honest.

But I'm back and snapping away. The snow has been and gone though I shot out that morning, slithered down to see The Crofter - and no-one to be seen. Can't blame them really. It was cold.

409

Yay, eleven piglings have arrived! Granted it was a few days ago but now word got to me, I'd loaded the camera with film, bothered to walk down the road and everything, the blimin things are snuggled in their little warm centrally-heated hoosey refusing to come out for a photo-call. At least, refusing to come out for a photo-call in the moments I was there and outside, in-between the heavy and persistent hail and rain.

I stood under a roofette of the roofy place just by the hutch where the piglings were residing, ready to leap into action and pap them up. If the wetness would stop. It didn't much so I took delight in what I could see from my dryish perch - the coils of pipe stuff, the hail bouncing off The Crofter and Crofter's Dad's heads as they carried out what was left of the big pig-hutches after the piggies has leant on them, chewed them and let off wind in the general direction of the hutch wall. On second thoughts that last bit may have been The Crofter himself. Never mind, the hutch wall needed to be changed so that the soon to arrive more piglings have another nice warm hoosey to eat.

408

That's a sausage growing there in case you are wondering. Little lamb inside all mashed up and everything. How lovely that is. For meat eaters perhaps. Less so for us more sensitive types - and the lamb. Still, it's the sort of thing Mr Crofter does on a dull day.

Meanwhile, a duck is enjoying the dampness outside. Maybe it's the only thing that does enjoy the weather like this.

407

Please don't tell me the snap is blurred. I've just looked out the window and it all looks like that. And the horizon is sloping. Granted I'm just out of bed but believe me, it feels like this if not 'looks' like this. Actually, despite the forecast weather, the sun is out - so I can see little at all through my salt encrusted windows.

All the same I imagine The Crofter is just wrapping his lips around a bowl of pig-pellets or whatever he has for breakfast these days. He is working hard after all with the tooth factory going full tilt, smoke pouring out of it's metaphorical chimney as the pearly whites come off the artisan production line.  Although, the locals will be pleased to hear, not today.

There's The Crofter's regulation bucket of builders tea on his work bench next to the tooth-makers Bunsen-burner. It keeps the tea warm longer you see.

Oh look, there's The Great Man himself doing 'things' with Mum Crofter making sure he does it properly. 

It's all gone a bit misty outside. [remember this is NOT today eh? ], perhaps there's a mystery to be solved. That's what happens when a mist swirls about surely? The mystery is where is Dad Crofter? Oh here he is, look through the oblong metal doors and he's spraying water all over the place cleaning off the s**** from the wheeled box for transporting animules thing.

A mere snapshot for the lives of The Crofters

406

Tis true, I have not posted here for a day or two. I have a life you know. Not much of one perhaps but what I do have is important to me.

So The Crofter has had to wait a little. But this morning, after listening to how the soft-southern Brits have been struggling with the wee strong breeze that crossed their path for a change, I tootled down in the warm sunshine and breathless air to see what was happening on The Croft. As it happens, not much. Mr Crofter Sir, him of the .... well you know - was working in the tooth factory. Mum Crofter was doing her thing in there too. While Dad Crofter dug a hole in the drive while we watched on to let the water drain off. It rained a tad overnight you see. I noticed the water splooshing down the river the other morning after another wee shower in the night. A wee shower that woke me from my fitful slumbers such was it's ferocity.

But the rain showers soon came back again as I watched them move across The Minch o'er there.

This two legged beast remained inside the byre while the rain spotted down.

And Dad Crofter later spent time doing muddy things and avoiding the white terrorists lurking nearby.

405

I forgot to ask Lizz if she photographed the Crofter in the bath!

404

He's popular again - as he should be I suppose what with all those animules and his generally pleasant demeaner. That sounds rather a back-handed compliment but it's not meant to be I can tell you. Mr Crofter Sir took Eve and I out for a lovely meal the other evening - along with the delightful Lizz from the USA who had been documenting The Crofting. Only, it was Dad Crofter who was 'doing' crofting things while The Crofter sat in his tooth factory making money to pay for it all.

Dad Crofter cleaning the box on wheels 

 Dad Crofter cutting up turnips while Lizz snaps

Dad Crofter catches his breath in the sunshine

Tired shoes

403

I wrote about this 'goings on' the other day. Trying to move a big thing full of water from down there to up there on the apportionment. Now I have some snaps to go with it. I should have waited but I have to admit to being rather impatient about such things. You can see the 'thing' is nearly empty above. That's because the water had been let out on account it couldn't be lifted by the Chinese tractor as it wasn't in it's five year plan. Or any plan at all it seems.

But the Crofter and Dad crofter pulled the proddy thing for the bag of the aforesaid tractor so as to fit it on the back. It's kept in the field you see.

 There was a certain amount of tooing and froing before the proddy thing was hanging where it should have been.

The water container sans most of the water was then crofter-handled onto a pallet then nailed to it - but not through the container itself. I mentioned that and got right funny looks I can tell you.

It was happening here - down on The Croft with the sea below, the big sky above and the chugging of the slightly off-colour tractor engine, It all got done in the end but i wasn't there to see it but snuggled up in front of the warm fire.

402

Sometimes, you have a nice camera in ones hands, some film loaded and an opportunity to snap someone up comes along - and you take it.

Dad Crofter

401

The Crofters are not averse to 'art' Far from it, they even consented to the creation of a Homage to one of the most memorable pieces of 'art' on their land. Only this Homage has been Hebride'ed up. A Homage to Murdo Duchamp rather than Marcel Duchamp. If you lived here you might realise what I am wittering on about. Either way I enjoyed myself and The Crofters were kind enough to ignore me while I defaced their sink.

Look, I am having fun and that's what counts!

400

Four hundred! Eh? What did I waffle on about then? Not going to read back to find out, you can do that.

It's not like this today I can tell you. Mr Crofter Dad may be outside waving at things, wondering what The Crofter said about something but, the rain is lashing down and there's probably a foot of mud and sh*te slopping around the place.

And if you think I'm going down the road in this today you have another think coming! Eh? I bet Turk is inside again dodging the wetness though. And Mr Crofter is ensconced in his tooth factory.

Sue Crofter will be sorting the house as usual, bringing a measure of decorum about the place.

I'm sat by the fire at home. Eh? Why not?

399

The geese won't be fooled, I tell you that for nothing.

Yes, yes I went down today. With loaded cameras. "Cameras" note, not "camera". That's just in case something happens and I don't run out of film.

Something was happening too. It was all going wrong and involved a great deal of 'botherations' and the like as gallons of water was put in this 'thing' for the coows up on the apportionment and then emptied again because the Chinese tractor lifting device at the back had gone on strike;. It wouldn't work anyway. So smelly oily stuff was poured in this special place on the tractor and apparently that will make it work. Probably.

Only I didn't wait the 2 hours to find out since I have a life to live. And don't get telling me the horizon is crooked you pinickity photo-pixel types. We are on the edge of the world up here and that's how it looks. At least, when the wind is blowing anyway.

398

Sorry and all that sort of thing ones says. Been away and been a tad under the weather too. But The Crofter and family are well and carrying on. I shall be off down to see them later. It's a little damp in the air so back to normal really.

I was down a The Croft just before I took a short sojourn on the mainland just over the water from the old place. All seemed to be fine except for some seriously dis-chuffed ducks ready caged on their way to a new home somewhere on the island.

 Ducks a la'orange box

 Nailing; apparently.

 Pigs on the loose [again]

Sue watches on