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The Crofter passes SlartibartfastLand  on the way to the beach

Look, that's almost a smile. For The Crofter that's a smile anyway. Christmas Day it was. Eve and I dragged The Crofter down to the beach in the sunshine for a spot of mulled wine and some cake. Lovelee it was too. Only it seems the walk almost killed the fellow. Called in today this morning - more sun as it happens - and he tells me he hasn't been out for four days. Well, despite my maths not being what it wasn't, I can't count four days between then and now. But he did sound rough I must admit. Coughing and everything. Dr phoned him and everything while I was there so he's off to be listened too. when the coows have been fed that is. Once the Land-Rover has been started. Then he will be listened too.

Mum and Dad Crofter who have also been under the weather are recovering well since you ask.

These snappettes where taken with the Fuji GSW690. All under-exposed. Eh?

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Oh yes, the sun got him out of bed today - was so bright outside his window he had to look out to see if the world was a hellish fireball or something. It wasn't was just the sun we hadn't seen for a week or two. And how happy he was! For him.

Eve and I dragged him down to the beach for a muled whine [or is it wine - both probably] and home-made Stollen sat on a rock in the warm sunshine. The recent storms had washed all the sand away - about 1.5 metres of it. Depth that is! Wonder where it has gone?

I think Mr Crofter Sir has gone back home to fall asleep in front of TV.  Oh joy ??

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We were wondering where he was when we called in. The door was open the geese still had their full compliment yet of The Crofter there was no sign.

Now it seems the poor hungover Crofter was in his bed nursing a sore head after a less than constrained night out with another Tolsta-head. It must have been a 'good' night as Mr Crofter Sir doesn't remember much about it or how he ended up where he did - and that I will leave to your imagination since it made me blush. At his age he should know better. Funny how his hang-overed mush has a slight smile lurking somewhere though!

Mr Crofter's Christmas started early me thinks!

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Eh?

Captions please ?

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The Crofter's first Christmas visitor arrived today in real style. A big green trailer with nicely turned out attendants turned up and out strode Oink-oink.

Don't look at me like that. I don't make these names up you know. Well, not all of them and certainly not this one. I mean, talk about creativity!!!

Anyway, Oink-oink is a lovely Gloucester old spot piggi come over to the croft for a spot of cuddling with Butch - a saddleback. Can't imagine what the little-uns going to look like.

Oink-oink in her holiday hutch [wink, wink. nudge, nudge]

As usual, I was totally unprepared for this unexpected [to me] arrival and shot the snaps with a piece of plastic loaded with very slow film. Too slow as it happens. But you get the drift..... I mean, what do you expect? Art?

Mr Crofter watches Oink-oink

The Crofter and his Dad contemplate as Oink-oink settles in.

 Then off to feed the other boys and girls

 Butch sidles over to see who has arrived

 Eye candy, Butch stylee.

 Dad Crofter awaits with more food.

Then retreats behind the new gate to watch the 'fun' with mum Crofter.

There's a bit of a racket down at the croft now. Just for a change. Must be more food on the way as Ms Oink-oink isn't ready for any handy-panky yet. She has her reputation to think of!

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It's that time of year again. Christmas and all that. The geese are looking a bit shifty - with good cause as it happens.In the meantime, they have been enjoying the mild weather of a last couple of days.
Mr Crofter Sir is working hard with the toof factory while Mum & Dad Crofter keep things animule in order.

 Mum Crofter in the sun

 The Crofter in the toof factory

Dad Crofter standing by the tractor which is currently - working ! Yay!

They will have to celebrate though - and wish all 'their' readers a wonderful festive season and a fantastic 2013. As I do.

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 This IS Mr Crofter Sir

Surprising isn't it? Was wondering if Mr Crofter had fallen asleep at the side of the road while Clocks was strimming. Only I notice its all nicely squared off - like someone who knew what they were doing did it - and not Lewis Crofters. Obviously  Lewis Crofters know what they are doing but, they are yet to open a hair-dressers in town. Perhaps the sheep shearer did it?? Anyway, what with the beginnings of a beard an all, Mr Crofter Sir is looking very,,,,, very ,,,,,, whatever he's looking these days.

 The Crofter has a dainty cup of tea.

 See, all squared up and all.

Sheeps

The sheeps - the woolly backs [white sheeps] are doing ok - the black one are out on the range [Tolsta Head I think] but the turkeys are looking nervous!

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Down croft no. 10.

The clocks are all ticking and Mr Crofter assures me that they show the correct time too. Tolsta time that is.

The crofts are frozen at the moment due to the hard frost last night but Mr Crofter Sir is in the warmth of the tooth factory. Fluff and Rambo still patrol the perimeter fences - although we did have to extract Fluff from between the fence and the back of the peat-'clamp'. "There was nice grass there " he indicated. There was, but once in he couldn't get out. Not a word of thanks either as he hopped off down the garden. Sheeps eh?

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The potatoes are in. Dad Crofter went out and dug the rest of the Shetland Black Potatoes out of the ground before the rooks did for them. David found one such tuber on an adjoining croft after the feathered creatures nicked them then dropped them.

Dad Crofter digging

Told you they were black!

Meanwhile, back in the house, Mum Crofter is busy making Doris Pies to compliment the Doris Burgers and the like. Despite me not eating meat, they did look lovely. There is no time to waste at The Croft as there is so much to do - and Mr Crofter Sir, 'im of the... etc is busy making money in the toof factory.

Doris pies

Mr Crofter used his hard-earned money and bought himself a clock. Another clock as it happens. And no it is not a Westminster since you ask, and no it does not show the correct time here either - just like the other mechanical clocks in the place. It's a croft. Eh?

Still, the little plastic alarm clock is showing the correct time - and isn't moving backwards either.

Clock

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 Mum Crofter

 Hanging things

Yes, they are still there. Keeping the croft going, bringing in the pennies and moving sheeps from here to there. Only, two sheeps Fluff and Rambo have been kept on at The Croft as guard sheeps. Venture anywhere near and Rambo will eventually hobble over for a scratch behind the ears while Fluff runs off to hide - or to continue to eat his way through the thin looking hedge.

There's things hanging in the - whatever room it is now. Long meaty things that were Maclaren I think. They make a nice snap though so that's what I do - snap them up with Sue cleaning windows.

Meaty things

Outside the winter sun is shining with rain always lurking springing the inevitable rainbow, single or even double, over the croft, over the sea or anywhere. The Starlings are always around looking for un-eaten piggie/duck/turkey/chicklette nosh. They make wild patterns in the sky as they murmur around. Crofter's Dad isn't so keen on them as he says they spread disease to the croft animuls. And perhaps there is some research to support this..

Monochrome rainbow with starlings

The Crofter is still busy in the tooth factory. Managing to give a thorough steam clean to the place when two Burcos didn't switch off overnight as they were supposed to do - all part of the teef making process. The Crofter remained calm in the circumstanes which rather upset his plans for the day.

Teef awaiting finishing

Rambo and Fluff guard the Chinese Tractor

The tractor is working again after a slight hiatus with the starter motor. And the rev counter that goes backwards, and the fuel gauge that doesn't work. I could go on but I won't.

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Fluff

Fluff is not happy.
He heard about the impending new house pet and took umbridge. Fair kept The Crofter on his toes for a few hours by getting Rambo along with him and making The Crofter's life hell.

Now, The Crofter has decided against the new doggie and brought Fluff into his lounge to warm his feet in the evening. Every story has a happy ending.

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Alethia
Alicia
Agatha
Agnes
Avril
Azoba


"nope"

Bertha
Brazialia
Billie - "mmmmm"
Bonnie
Blackie

Carmilia
Collia
Champagne
China

Donalda
Dali
Doggie


tbc

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Soon The Croft will be complete. A little puppy yet to be named will be relocating from Donald Four Tractors to Mr Crofter Sir, 'im of them committees and what have you.'Im of the toof factory.

Mr Crofter is excited at the thought and already is perusing 'name' books for the little creature. I's a collie by the way - that's black and white. Any suggestions will be gratefully received for names - then probably ignored ! I have already posited 'Daphne' - but that didn't go down well at all.

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A few months is a long time in Crofting.