Sunday, 8 January 2012


There's been mayhem down on t'croft. Yes, yes, I know you have heard this before but believe me when I say 'mayhem' I mean 'Reservoir Pigs' sort of mayhem. The sort of mayhem where Dad Crofter comes in and gravely say's "Paul, you better come and sort this out" then gets out of the way fast. That sort.

 The Crofter talks firmly to Maclaren [to no avail it must be said]

 In here

Doris' nose

It seems one of the lady piggies has come into season - as she is meant to do. She's with Dutch [formerly Butch - but changed because of The Crofter's sensibilities] the young boar who was trying to do his thing but only seemingly getting Doris' [or whoever it was] ire up sending her screaching round their hutch. Sounded like she was getting murdered not just 'covered' [a more sensitive term than the reality]. Meanwhile Maclaren, he of the firing blanks, the hugeness and the hutch next door was getting so p*ssed off and frustrated he had been trying to eat his way through the hutch wall - a mixture of heavy wire fence and wrinkled tin.  The result was a right royal racket with Maclaren foaming at the mouth having cut his lips on the tin he was managing to partly destroy. Meanwhile Doris [or whoever etc] had also damaged her dainty nose trying to escape the admirations and advances of Dutch. What a bloody nightmare!

The Crofter spoke very firmly to Maclaren I can tell you. I had to cover my ears and everything. It didn't do an ounce of good. The last was saw of the scene was The Crofter letting Doris and Dutch/Butch out onto the croft - to give stop Maclaren eating his way through the fence, and to give Doris a fighting chance of avoiding the randy boar! I went home.

I might add here, the quality of these snaps were enhanced by the up-market camera I was using. It's plastic and cost me 99p - I've been had! I dropped it in the sand on the beach this morning so perhaps it might not work at all now

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